Head Bonks and Kitty Snortles

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Tsuki (pronounced Sue-Kee) is a green-eyed, solid black smallish cat that owns us.

Tsuki Grass Attack

Tsuki pretending she wasn’t just eating grass.

She came to Mancandy about 6 years ago as a tiny black fluff. It happened to be Halloween and some kids were giving away tiny black kittens. This one ended up in the hood of the pullover Mancandy wore as he gave out candy to trick-or-treaters. Mancandy gets into Halloween. Big time. He decorates and makes even the shiest child explain their costume. I would have been horrified to have to speak to a stranger as a child, but he is serious about every costume and every child and every bit of candy. They will earn their sweets dammit.

This past year I worked but got home in time for the last few gaggles of kids. Since I’ve been an adult (I use that terminology loosely) I’ve not lived anyplace that got much trick or treat traffic. However, some of my best childhood memories are of Halloween and the pure joy of dressing up as whatever I wanted and parading around in a costume all day and an actual parade in my costume and then running around getting all the candy I could possibly stuff in my pumpkin pail. That is kid paradise. When I pulled up to the house there were little superheroes and witches and werewolves everywhere. It was a bit like being a kid again and I was pretty pumped to see the candy giving action.

The candy action was not a disappointment. My dog had worn herself out trying to tell off all the trick or treaters and was snoring loudly. The kids were coming in small waves (it was getting late and it was a school night). Apparently, it was the end of the rush and these were the stragglers. I was tired from a long shift on my feet and sat listening to the craziness and peeking at costumes to match with voices from the living room window. My favorite was a little boy in a lion outfit that was scared to come on the porch. There was a hanging decoration we affectionately refer to as “Death” who was dangling from the porch light.  Mr. Lion was not having it.  I heard a high-pitched but very determined voice say “NO!  No, I’m not going. Nope.”

Mancandy was not letting a kid get away without candy, so he took Death down and put him on the porch.  “Come look! He is just an empty costume. It’s okay!”.  The lion’s mom chimed in, “It’s fake! Go on up there and get your candy, all the other kids are!”

“NO!”

“I promise he won’t hurt you!” Mancandy was crouched down.  He was turning Death over and showing he was mostly black fabric hanging in various layers.

I then hear a small grunt and the distinctive sound of Mancandy laughter.  “Alright then!” in a bemused but amused (that was fun to type) tone of voice.  He came in still laughing as he explained that Mr. Lion had gathered up his courage, run up to the porch, kicked the crap out of Death, grabbed his candy, and ran away.  I like that kid.

All that to say, Tsuki sat in that hood for hours and didn’t try to escape. As a kitten that’s fairly rare behavior. And she found herself with a home. Other pets have been added, but Tsuki remains the boss and is the favored fuzzy of Mancandy. She acts more like a dog than a cat.  She enjoys following us on our walks/jogs, prefers my dog to the other cats, and has zero fear.  She also head bonks.  If Tsuki loves you, there’s no doubt.  She’ll walk up to you and smack her head into yours.  Sometimes it’s a gentle bonk, sometimes you see stars and your eyes water.  She also does goofy stuff like find a window she can watch you from and when she’s ready to come in, hangs on the screen and yells.

Tsuki Somebodys watching me

Sometimes I feel like….somebody’s watching me…..

This morning I went out early and mowed the yard.  I, of course, got too hot (I’m the most ridiculous delicate thing about heat), and had a serious headache by the time I got showered off and changed. I laid down to see if that would help the pain ease up and Tsuki came to help me nap. Her version of help goes as follows:

Circle approximately 20 times with butthole passing very close to humans face each time. Settle down in humans armpit area and pull arm around self. Use claws to ensure arm goes where it is wanted. Purr like a maniac. Decide love has not been shown and rectify by massive head bonk along with extremely loud purring. Repeat circling and arm moving. Try to bathe humans arm and make arm sore. Adjust arm every time human starts to drift off, liberal use of claws to ensure compliance. When human has drifted off, get up, smash face into the human face, purr, and begin the process over again. When human gets angry immediately begin snoring in adorable little snorts, termed kitty snortles. Human will settle back in.

That went on for about 2 hours. I finally gave up and got up. I love snuggling with fuzzy creatures but head bonks while nauseous with a headache is just too much love. As I type this she is being kicked off the other couch for trying to snuggle with Mancandy and using her claws on his leg. It’s a hard life for the queen of the household.

As an aside, I had to rescue her from the front porch where a group of birds decided to corner her and screech her to death. She’s not exactly skilled at catting.

Tsuki Tongue Attack

Further proof the catting is not strong with this one. 

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