Hello strangers! I thought I would just let this go and start over, I haven’t posted in ages, but that seemed rude. The problem with writing in a format others whom know you personally read is the inability to be brutally honest. Or, I felt I had the inability. I thought about just changing the name, changing the direction, and moving forward, but I think I will find writing more rewarding when I don’t feel the need to censor everything.
As an effort to leave some sort of closure, mental illness doesn’t exist in a vacuum. When you can’t be yourself in a relationship, it’s not really a relationship anymore. So, my pup, my kit, and my tired self left Nashville. I’m going back up this coming weekend to get the rest of my stuff out of the house, the extremely important stuff I stashed at a friends house, and some furniture another friend so generously donated to the cause. After so many years of trying to build a solid foundation in quicksand, it feels nice to feel like myself again. Even if everything is chaos. At least it’s my own chaos.
So, I am going to let this blog go in order to move on to a different, more freeing format. I appreciate all of the support, the experience, and the fun community here on WordPress. Looking forward to the next chapter.
To anyone who happens to stumble on this who may need to hear it:
If you ever have to say “It could be worse, he doesn’t hit me”…something is wrong.
If you feel you can’t speak honestly…something is wrong.
If there’s ever a conversation where your significant other considers you a victim in the relationship and is able to say that with no sense of urgency in fixing what makes them treat their partner that way…something is wrong.
Being scared of your partner means something is wrong.
Getting out is the most dangerous time. Be careful. Take care of yourself. Please know itt gets so much better.
Thanks again, for everything.